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it was 2029 and the world was smashed to bits
crazy fucking robots and their robot fucking shit

I came from the future where we had no trees or cops
humans beaten by machines and forced to eat from troughs

I was sent to change the past — told to fight the fight
but I must admit that sans police, the future looked alright

so I chose to do nothing, let robots kill us all
I’d be a robot skate hero; we’d shred suburban sprawl

apocalypse: it came and went, just like they said it would
suffice to say my mission failed, I did not do much good

but good is bad and bad is good and now I have the stoke
the future’s now, the past is gone, a world covered in smoke


O! what a dirty twist of fate, my skate crew’s way too sweet
the cops are gone, I still can’t skate: the ‘bots all rule my street

they drained and skate the swimming pools, too good at getting air
D-linked kegs, pizza downloads, they never fucking share

“pizza and beer for free for all,” shouted the robot pope
“except for the human, tie him up with 3 feet of old rope!”

kicked aside and forgotten, nothing left to enjoy
at least I got my old job back: pizza delivery boy

extra cheesy pizza clogs my guts like glue,
deliver to the old man’s house, stinks worse than my nuts do


from DARK SIDE OF THE BRAIN, released August 5, 2009
Additional Lyrics: John Almquist & Patrick Jarvis-Shean


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Brain Vacation Chicago, Illinois

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